Archive for June, 2011

Satan’s Bitches

June 28, 2011

I have written a horror screenplay and now I need help funding the damn thing! Have set up a kickstarter account:

Satan’s Bitches will be many things: erotic, pants-pissingly hilarious and insane. It will star a host of downtown art stars including Reverend Jen, Faceboy, Liz Medina, Jason J-Boy Thompson, Stormy Leather, Tiffany Cross, Devyl Dave and more. The script revolves around 2 schoolgirls who ditch class only to run into a band of half-assed Satanists who kidnap them for one unholy purpose! There are several other crazy subplots including a Ouija Board that speaks Yiddish, a love affair between a stoner and an incubus and a ritual gone horribly wrong.

This will be the 4th film made by ASS Studios, the impoverished Dreamworks of the Lower East Side, run by Courtney Fathom Sell and Reverend Jen who won’t let a little thing like having no money whatsoever stop them from realizing their dream of making movies.

We DO have an incredible script and great performers, but we need several costumes and props that are out of ASS Studio’s budget!

Last Minute Screening of “Rev/ Quest for Cameltoe!”

June 22, 2011

REV / QUEST FOR CAMELTOE…this Saturday, 8 p.m. at Bowery Poetry Club (308 Bowery), 5 bucks

If you missed it the first time, you are in luck! The Sat. show at Bowery cancelled and we’ve jumped in to save the day, providing you with bargain entertainment you won’t soon forget!

Come see the first documentary ever to capture the Art Star scene in all its insane glory. (What “Pull My Daisy” was to the Beats this movie is to the Art Stars!!!) Admission is only 5 bucks. (Side Note: We’ve *heard* this film is best seen under the influence of medicinal substances.)

REV / QUEST FOR CAMELTOE ( 69 minutes ), a new film by Jason Thompson starring Reverend Jen, Faceboy, Moonshine Shorey, Mike Raphone, and Mangina. Featuring appearances by Mike Amato, Angry Bob, Michelle Carlo, Rachel Cleary, Fritz Donelly, Abby Hertz, Juggernut, Reverend Jen Junior, John King, Stormy Leather, Duchess Wendi McDermott, Jim Melloan, John Murdock, Moby, Rob Prichard, Amanda Pearson, Bruce Smolanoff, Courtney Weber, and more!

For almost twenty years now, Reverend Jen and the community of lively misfits who are her collaborators have been creating live theater, publishing books, and keeping New York weird in the best way. The course of events documented in REV / QUEST FOR CAMELTOE follow the pathetically underfunded stages in the production of episode five of Really Cool Neighborhood, a profane stage play in the format of children’s television.

Weinergate and the NY Post

June 17, 2011

Did anyone else notice that the NY Post lifted Metro NYC’s “Stick a Fork in Him” headline from several days ago? NY Post: If you can’t come up w/ your own Weiner headline, fire your news room.

‘Bout Time

June 17, 2011

Finally! Equality in NY for same-sex couples.

Can’t wait to perform more gay weddings!

Hotel on Rivington

June 17, 2011

It’s that time of year again! Time for my “neighbors”, the Hotel on Rivington, to play crappy music at highest volume from their glass tower across from my humble abode until 4 a.m., in effect, TORTURING me as I try to have coherent, creative thoughts. I have hated “THOR” since it opened (protested its opening along w/ several other LES residents) given the fact that its appearance in the ‘hood ushered in an era of small LES businesses and longtime tenants being priced out AND also given the owner is a gazillionaire who’s evicted quite a few poor art stars from the nearby tenements he owns.

This kind of disrespecting the neighbors and the neighborhoods bullshit by trendy hotels is allover the city and 311 needs to step up their game!!! Or else I’m gonna have to grab a boombox and visit the various hotels’ bridge and tunnel customers early on Sunday mornings with some religious music playing at highest volume (or maybe just white noise.)

And don’t even get me started on the various d-bags blocking the sidewalks at night. Note: This doesn’t happen in front of longtime neighborhood bars where the bouncers, owners and bartenders actually maintain some modicum of control and respect for people who are forced to live amongst this bs.

PLEASE, if you happen to be reading my blog and are looking to stay in NYC at a hotel (not really advisable anyway since there are so many great week-long apartment rentals) check out what the neighbors think about said hotel. You’d be surprised!

My first neighborhood rant of the summer. Can’t believe it didn’t come sooner. Also, check out some of the articles on Gothamist surrounding the noise issues. They actually make it funny.

Fun Interview

June 16, 2011

While digging through old essays in an effort to get my novel together (36,000 words down and having a freakout!) I came across a fun interview I did with Time Out New York for their Sex Issue 2 years ago. It was never printed in its entirety so printing it here:

Your current profession/job: art star

 Previous sex- or erotic-related professions/jobs: sex-columnist for Nerve and author of an erotic memoir

 Your neighborhood of residence (Chelsea, Williamsburg, etc.): Lower East Side

ABOUT NEW YORK CITY

(1) Has NYC lost its mojo? Why or why not?

 New York City’s mojo is simply exhausted from working overtime. It’s currently taking a nap and is set to wake up when the hipsters grow up, have children and move out. 

 (2) On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being a highly repressed nun and 10 being a scene from Caligula, how conservative is NYC, especially compared to other large cities? Explain!

 Well, we have our own official condom. Not many other cities can say that. Come to think of it, NYC was also the home of America’s first birth control clinic, which opened in 1916. And yet somehow, New York City’s population just keeps growing so obviously, someone here is getting laid.

 (3) What is the sexiest person, place or thing in NYC?

 The Statue of Liberty because she’s got an open invitation inscribed at her base. When people in other countries got a load of her they started coming in droves.

(4) In your experience, what’s the biggest hurdle New Yorkers need to overcome sexually?

 They’re too goal-oriented. Everyone is so busy trying to shoot loads or to get their partner to shoot loads, or to shoot loads at the same time as their partner or whatever that they forget that just feeling pleasure is good enough.

 

(5) Are there any local pornographers or performers, exotic dancers, escorts, filmmakers, artists, photographers, writers, etc., doing exceptional, notable or groundbreaking work in the sex/erotica arenas?

 Patrick Bucklew a.k.a. Mangina is the only person I know of who’s making casts of the vulvas of New York City’s most iconic women. I hope he someday opens a museum.

(6) What is the scourge of the NYC sex industry? Interpret this how you wish. 

The economy!

 (7) What’s the best sex shop in NYC? And what’s your all-time favorite sex toy, product or film?

 Bed Bath and Beyond. After all the weird shit I did as a sex columnist, I’m just really into fucking on a comfortable bed. My fave “sex” film is the Lord of the Rings trilogy. You think it’s over and then it just keeps going and giving you pleasure. It’s like tantric sex.

(8) Where’s the best place to hook up in NYC? This could be a great singles bar or a play party—anything!

 At my open mike (4th Wed. of every month at Bowery Poetry Club) lots of people who are too strange to meet people at places where “normals” hang out, have found love and sex. Only thing is if you disappear with someone, you might miss your spot.

(9) Which of the five boroughs is the sexiest and why?

 Queens because it’s Spiderman’s birthplace.

 

ABOUT YOU, YOUR JOB AND YOUR SEX LIFE 

(10) How did you get into this line of work? Do you see yourself doing this type of work until retirement?

 I wrote some articles for Nerve and they offered me the column, which I was, financially, in no position to refuse.

 (11) Does your job make you better in bed? Please explain.

 Absolutely! The sheer number of workshops I attended (fellatio school, a tantric sex class, an S&M reformatory, etc.) and research materials I studied (Seymour Butt’s Complete Guide to Female Ejaculation, She Comes First, Blow Him Away: How to Give Him Mind-Blowing Oral Sex, The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Tantric Sex and dozens of others) gave me an education more valuable than the one I got at art school.

 (12) How do most New Yorkers react when they find out what you do? Do the reactions ever vary by gender or orientation? Moreover, how has your job negatively or positively affected romantic relationships?

 When I was writing the column, having any type of romance was almost impossible. People would come up to me on the street and ask me to fuck them with a strap-on, but no one ever asked me to dinner and a movie.

 (13) What is the wildest thing you’ve ever done in the name of work?

 I suppose going undercover as a nude maid.  

(14) Have you ever been arrested? If it happened here, what was your experience with the NYPD like?

 Nope.

(15) What’s the freakiest fetish or most outrageous sexual request you’ve ever gotten? Did you indulge it?

To “fluff” someone before they had sex with a jar of mayonnaise and yes, I did fluff them.  It was his birthday after all.

(16) What’s one sexual act you’re embarrassed you’ve never tried?

 Can’t think of anything.

(17) How many people have you slept with? Do you think this number surprises people? 

 Less than Wilt Chamberlain but more than the aforementioned nun.

(18) Have you ever had VD? What kind?

 Do boyfriends count?

(19) Have you ever had a famous client?

 Not applicable.

(20) As someone who is immersed in sex/erotica, got any tricks of the trade or tips for readers?

 I know working out is a pain in the ass, but you should do your kegels.  I’m doing mine right now.

(21) Are you ever bored by sex (doing it or talking about it)?

I doubt I’ll ever grow tired of having it, but I never want to be known as someone who only writes about sex. That said, I really only like reading books with lots of sex and depravity in them so I’m sure whatever I write, it will continue to be lurid.  

 

“Rev” Screenings?

June 14, 2011

Not writing much here cuz I’m busy working on my next book…a novel! I figure I have to *try* to write a novel and then when I’m done I can go back to endlessly writing memoirs. Enough crazy stuff has happened to me that I’ve amassed material for a lifetime worth of memoirs. SO, not blogging much. Just a quick note: If anyone knows of any cool places where Jboy can screen his feature length documentary about me, lemme know. It’s really a stellar film and venues are hard to come by.

Thanks, peeps.

Robot Day Speech

June 12, 2011

Here’s the speech I gave on the steps of Federal Hall yesterday (in a robot voice and clad in a robot costume, of course.)

Greetings, Humans. I am a robot sometimes known as Reverend Jen. I am going to dance today in a street-style dance popularized by the Jacksons in ages past in order to protest all laws  pertaining to dance and even though I am not human, I have sense enough to know that human like to dance.

So listen up, Bloomberg: New York City is the best city in the world and should be an example to rest of world. You human who live here are trendsetters so set a trend that dance is legal here and pretty soon dance will be legal everywhere, even at Jefferson Memorial.

Look at my fun foam Statue of Liberty headgear. I wear it in the name of liberty and I rhythmically make a robot dance in pursuit f happiness. Won’t you join me in fighting tyranny? I love New York New York New York…

Elf Workout!

June 6, 2011

Just in time for “bikini season” here’s a trailer for my new Elf Workout! (Entire workout coming soon!)

National Do the Robot Day

June 5, 2011

In response to the latest recently passed ridiculous dance laws and subsequent arrests, The Dance Liberation Front has sprung to action. Please join us for Do the Robot Day!